Wise and Weird

Yeah Yeah Yeah

♦  
What if my dog only brings back the ball because he thinks I like throwing it?

♦   Your future self is watching you right now through memories.

♦   If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?

♦   Which letter is silent in the word “Scent,” the S or the C?

♦   Do twins ever realise that one of them is unplanned?

♦   Why is the letter W, in English, called double U? Shouldn’t it be called double V?

♦   Maybe oxygen is slowly killing you and it just takes 75-100 years to fully work.

♦   Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.

♦   The word “swims” upside-down is still “swims”.

♦   One hundred years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.

♦   The doctors who told Stephen Hawking he had two years to live in 1953 are probably dead.

♦   If you replace “W” with “T” in “What, Where and When” you get the answer to each of them.

♦   Many animals probably need glasses, but nobody knows it.

♦   If you rip a hole in a net, there are actually fewer holes in it than there were before.

♦   Please note I am only the purveyor of these words of weirdly wiseness.

  When 22/2/2022 falls on Tuesday, we’ll just call it “2’s Day”.

♥   Gretchen Bernet-Ward

Calendar Date 22.2.2022
Where will you be on Twosday?  I will be at an Art Discussion group – GBW

Mystery, Mayhem & Magic adventures for young readers!

The Ten Penners, a children’s author collective, launched their blog tour to coincide with the release of their exciting new anthology Mystery, Mayhem & Magic.  Follow the tour, read about Julie Baythorpe, book giveaway and more—

Mystery, Mayhem & Magic is an anthology of amazing adventures for young readers!

Take a path through the forest of imagination into mysterious journeys filled with mayhem and a kaleidoscope of magical creatures.

From the authors of Shock! Horror! Gasp! and Fan-Tas-Tic-Al Tales emerges Mystery, Mayhem & Magic, a new anthology written by The Ten Penners, a paperback novel-size book which is jam-packed with thirty-six stories, poems and novellas suitable for children aged 8 to 12 and early readers.  Stories can be read to younger children too …

… So come and explore!

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The Ten Penners children’s author group

The Ten Penners Profile Photo 02


Follow the fascinating Mystery,
Mayhem & Magic
Blog Tour any time—

DATES

15/10/17
Sunday
 – Marion Martineer – https://marionmartineer.wordpress.com/
Dimity Powell – author “The Fix-It Man” – http://dimswritestuff.blogspot.com.au/
Content : Marion Martineer

16/10/17
Monday
Yvonne Mes – www.yvonnemes.com
Content : The Ten Penners
Elaine Ouston – author “Mystery of Nida Valley” – https://elaineoustonauthor.com/ 
Content : Lindy Standage

17/10/17
Tuesday
 – Jill Smith – https://authorjillsmith.wordpress.com/
Candice Lemon-Scott, author – https://candicelemonscott.com.au/
Content : Jill Smith

18/10/17
Wednesday
– Kate Russell – https://katharinerussell.wordpress.com/
Teena-Rafa Mulligan – In Their Own Write – https://intheirownwrite.wordpress.com 
Content : Kate Russell

19/10/17
Thursday
 – Julie Baythorpe – https://juliebaythorpeauthor.wordpress.com/
Gretchen Bernet-Ward – Thoughts Become Words https://thoughtsbecomewords.com
Content : Julie Baythorpe (see interview below)

20/10/17
Friday
– Robin Adolphs – http://www.robinadolphs.com/
Content : Louisa Wright
Artelle Lenthall – www.journeygirlontheroadtopublication.com
Content : Sharron Alexiou

21/10/17
Saturday Gold Coast Writers’ Association meeting to announce book launch
The Ten Penners – https://thetenpenners.wordpress.com/
(Library book launch Gold Coast Libraries Calendar of Events poster below)

23/10/17
Monday – Aleesah Darlison – author of “Fox and Moonbeam”
Greenleaf Press – http://www.greenleafpress.net/
Content : Elli Housden

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The Ten Penners launch their children’s anthology

PLINKO
The Ten Penners Plinko Colouring Comp 2017 02
Check out Plinko, official The Ten Penners mascot, on their website under Media Kit.  The Plinko-Colouring-In-Competition-2017_Booklaunch has closed.

“But wait,” says Plinko, “there’s more!”

  Scroll down for further INFORMATION—

The Ten Penners August 2017
The Ten Penners ready for Mystery Mayhem & Magic

BE THE LUCKY WINNER … 

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SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT  –  BOOK GIVEAWAY COMPETITION CLOSED!

There will be a giveaway of a copy of Mystery, Mayhem & Magic!
At the end of the blog tour, those who have left a comment on this page, or on any of the other hosts’ pages during the blog tour, will be in the running to receive a free copy!
The announcement of the winner will be at our book launch at Broadbeach Library on Saturday 4 November 2017.
So, please make a comment below to be in the running.

Q & A  

Today I am delighted to welcome one of the authors, Julie Baythorpe, who has kindly put her literary thoughts into words:                                              

The Ten Penners
Julie Baythorpe
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Julie at her book launch

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Julie Baythorpe was born in Sydney and moved to Brisbane where she attended Brisbane Central State School.  She loved every minute of school life so much so she never left the education system.  In 1985 she moved to the Gold Coast.  Julie has written all her life.  For many years, she taught creative writing, both as a Teacher and Principal in classrooms across Queensland.  When she retired from teaching she started writing full-time.  She has written and published numerous short stories, poems, journal articles and has developed many Curriculum documents for Education Queensland.  She is currently organising and presenting writing workshops for the Gold Coast Writers’ Association.  Her books include the Reid Devron murder mystery series and several short story anthologies.  Julie also enjoys creating watercolour paintings … when she’s not writing!


Q1.
When did you start writing?

A.  I started when I was very young … five or six years old.  I loved it.  I had a vivid imagination (still have) which transported me to mystical and magical places.  As I grew older I began writing poems and stories for the children I taught in primary school. I also wrote strategic documents … curriculum documents, behaviour management programs and planning outlines for Education Queensland.  I started writing fiction full-time when I retired from teaching.

Q2. Which genres do you enjoy writing?

A.  I enjoy writing in most genres, however, I feel most comfortable writing novels in the murder mystery category.  As a member of The Ten Penners writing group, I’ve dabbled in short story writing for children again.  It’s been a while since I did this, however, I enjoyed creating the character ‘Plinko’ and I loved the adventures of Jock, Davo and Birch in ‘Birch the Dinosaur and the Bogan Penguins’.  A lot of fun!

Q3. Have you published any books?

The Ten Penners Julie Baythorpe 03A.  Yes, I’ve published three books in the Reid Devron murder mystery series. ‘The Lavender Principal’, ‘Silo Deadfall’, and ‘Under the Fig Tree’, all set in schools where I’ve worked.  In collaboration with the Southern Short Story Group (another sub-group of Gold Coast Writers’ Association) I wrote a number of fictional short stories.  The title of that book is ‘Love, Lies, Laughter and a Few Little Tears’.

Q4. Have you won any writing competitions?

A.  Only one … when I was about nine years old.  They asked me to read it to the whole school.  I’ve been traumatised ever since!  But it didn’t stop my love of writing!

Q5. Do you have a plan/schedule for your writing?

A.  Early in the morning is a great time for my writing sessions.  I fade by the afternoon.  I usually collect ideas in my head and jot down notes … Firstly, in a scribbled, illegible mess.  To tidy my ramblings, I develop a timeline for two or three pages then add chapters and scenes.  For example, Chapter One … a body is found, police arrive, description of setting and some characters.  In a rough outline, I write down scenes in each chapter.  I use a scrapbook for pictures and details of my characters.  Lastly, I organise a folder for research, the book cover ideas, similes/metaphors, poems, and editing notes and pages.  Then it gets cracking!

Many thanks, Julie, for your time and inspiration.

The Ten Penners July17
Smiles all round for The Ten Penners

The Ten Penners Bookcover 03The Ten Penners Library Booklaunch Poster 4Nov2017

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The Ten Penners sub group of Gold Coast Writers’ Association

Don’t forget!  Post a comment below (or on any one of the blog tour sites) to be in the running for a giveaway copy of The Ten Penners new anthology Mystery, Mayhem & Magic!  IMPORTANT:  THE BOOK GIVEAWAY COMPETITION HAS CLOSED.

The Ten Penners Logo by Starla

Gretchen Bernet-Ward

The Ten Penners Book Launch 02
Plinko dropped in for the book launch!

Postcards Postcrossing the World

Postcards are alive and well and received by countless friends, family and complete strangers around the world.  Complete strangers?  This is where Postcrossing comes into the picture.

I first learned about Postcrossing, a postcard exchange group, from a quarterly Stamp Bulletin and joined free-of-charge.  The five-step guidelines are easy to follow, the website makes it simple to set up a profile and tweak your settings.  Navigate around and check out the stunning and prolific cards received and uploaded by Postcrossing members.  Everyone abides by the rules so things flow smoothly between more than 69,000 members in over 200 countries.

Postcard 017SEND: There’s pleasure in finding and choosing suitable postcards and stamps uniquely representative of your own location.  Clever members can match a postcard to followers hobbies.  It took a couple of weeks for the first postcard to hit my letterbox but I could start mailing out straight away.

RECEIVE: The beauty, variety and quantity I received, often from places I’d never heard of, was impressive.  English is universal although you can specify countries and language.  Handwritten, never laser printed, it takes a certain skill to describe something about yourself and your town on the back of a small piece of cardboard!

Postcrossing Logo

The Postcrossing project was created in 2005 by Postcrossing Founder Paulo Magalhães as a side project when he was a student in Portugal.  From 2008 to 2017, 40 million postcards have been sent.  Naturally Paulo loves to receive postcards and finding one in his mailbox always makes his day!

Postcard 007Right down to the different shapes of the stamps, and in some cases, distinctly long addresses, I was hooked on the fun.

The Postcrossing website has stats and charts to follow the progress of your postcards and I only had one go missing in action.  I think the British postcards were the quickest to arrive and I’ll be diplomatic and not say which was the slowest.  Larger countries sometimes lagged, perhaps because of sheer volume – or misguided postal cuts.  In Australia, there’s an infinite variety of unique postage stamps and supply doesn’t look like declining any time soon.

This world-wide concept stands strong, despite the challenges of internet and social media.  Stamps are still stuck on postcards, timeless messages are still written on the back, and they are still physically mailed to a real address.

Postcard 016Postcrossing friendships are possible via their blog, forum and meet-ups.  Due to work commitments, I closed my Postcrossing account and gave many of my postcards to a collector.  I kept a few colourful ones to wistfully gaze at on a quiet day.

Post a postcard!

Gretchen Bernet-Ward

 

Want more? The Snail Mail mega toons postcard edition

Teatowel of Ignominy

Ever do something just for fun?  Sure you have.  From an impromptu picnic to cooking a lavish dinner.  Sporty things, family things, shopping expeditions or entering a competition in the name of fun.

Recently I designed a book-themed teatowel for fun.  There was a prize involved but I won’t dwell on that because I did not win.  However, it did spawn this blog piece…

Tea Towel Design 03
G-B-W©Book Lifecycle artwork (Australia)

For those born into a dishwasher world, I will elaborate.  A teatowel is used to dry crockery and cutlery.  It is made of an oblong piece of linen or cotton material, naturally absorbent, hemmed on all sides and printed with a design.  The design is printed on one side, in portrait position.  Teatowels can be any colour, any theme, but traditionally the same fabric and size.  They can also be displayed poster-like on a kitchen wall.  The following teatowels are not ignominious!

Tea Towel Design 04
Raspberry Thistles©Scott Inness (Scotland)

Tourist destinations sell souvenir teatowels, the most glorious ones are those in public art galleries.  Gift shops offer cute ones with flowers, teacups, recipes or cow designs.  Craft groups use them as fund-raisers, while cookware stores display matching sets of oven mitt, apron and teatowel with a trendy designer logo.

Tea Towel Design 06
Friesian Cows©Rodriquez (Australia)

I have a large proportion of Australian flora and fauna too well-laundered to show here.  The examples displayed are the best I could find in the kitchen drawer.  A lovely giraffe print from Western Plains Zoo, Dubbo NSW, was singed from a cooking incident.  My recently purchased Cecily teatowel (below) is part of a book-themed series from New Zealand.  It will not suffer the fate of another limited edition teatowel which, shock horror, was used to wipe the stove griller.

Tea Towel Design 08
Cecily©Moa Revival (New Zealand)

Teatowels sound old-fashioned and domesticated but they can become the focus of teenage washing-up disputes and used as a weapon to flick people.  Snap!

Tea Towel Design 05
Babushka Dolls©Ladelle (Australia)

Apparently teatowels originated in Victorian England and were used at teatime to keep the china in good condition.  Baked goods were often laid on a teatowel to cool or alternatively kept moist under a teatowel.  The name is different in different countries, in Australia a dishtowel/dishcloth is used for more heavy duty cleaning.

Teacup 001
Tidy teatowel (Unknown)

No doubt there is an online history of teatowels and teatowel aficionados around the world, but I am content in the knowledge that I have owned many useful hard-working ones over the years.  Lightly imbued with nostalgia and sentiment, some were gifts, most I have bought, and one I designed myself which is not destined to be printed.  That’s a good thing.

Gretchen Bernet-Ward


BONUS:
My blog post is laden with afternoon tea foodie photographs
https://thoughtsbecomewords.com/2018/03/11/afternoon-tea-and-fancy-food/
Extra teatowel image courtesy of The National Trust UK
https://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/

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Made with care in UK for The National Trust 100% cotton.

Springtime Ode

September and spring is emerging in the southern hemisphere. And my garden!

Luminous Fluoro Flowers
My ode to springtime using DooDooLite

I have just found out what Crocosmia means!  Small, brightly coloured funnel-shaped blooms, sword-shaped foliage, grown from bulbs similar to the Iris family.  Grouped together they make ideal, butterfly-friendly floral displays.  Such a variety of colours and shapes to gladden the heart of any artistic gardener.

On Gardenia Creating Gardens website, companion planting with Crocosmia is reminiscent of English cottage gardens (see below) although they are natives of South Africa.  I haven’t planted Crocosmia, I should, they tolerate Brisbane’s subtropical climate, humidity, heat and current drought-like conditions.

Flower Crocosmia
https://www.gardenia.net/guide/Great-Companion-Plants-for-Your-Crocosmia

Since Queensland won’t be getting tropical rainfall for a couple of months yet, I will satisfy myself with what I can photograph in my own meagre garden; and add excerpts from some famous poems about springtime.

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“Spring” by Gerard Manley Hopkins
Nothing is so beautiful as Spring –
When weeds, in wheels, shoot long and lovely and lush;
Thrush’s eggs look little low heavens, and thrush
Through the echoing timber does so rinse and wring
The ear, it strikes like lightnings to hear him sing;
The glassy pear tree leaves and blooms, they brush
The descending blue; that blue is all in a rush
With richness; the racing lambs too have fair their fling.
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“A Light Exists in Spring” by Emily Dickinson
A Colour stands abroad
On Solitary Fields
That Science cannot overtake
But Human Nature feels.
It waits upon the Lawn,
It shows the furthest Tree
Upon the furthest Slope you know
It almost speaks to you.
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“September in Australia” by Henry Kendall 
Grey Winter hath gone, like a wearisome guest,
And, behold, for repayment,
September comes in with the wind of the West
And the Spring in her raiment!
The ways of the frost have been filled of the flowers,
While the forest discovers
Wild wings, with the halo of hyaline hours,
And the music of lovers.
Azalea and Dragon
“Lines Written in Early Spring” by William Wordsworth
Through primrose tufts, in that green bower,
The periwinkle trailed its wreaths;
And ’tis my faith that every flower
Enjoys the air it breathes.
Gnomes
“Australian Spring” by Hugh McCrae
And jolly Spring, with love and laughter gay
Full fountaining, lets loose her tide of bees
Upon the waking ember-flame of bloom
New kindled in the honey-scented trees.
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“Spring” by Christina Georgina Rossetti
There is no time like Spring,
When life’s alive in everything,
Before new nestlings sing,
Before cleft swallows speed their journey back
Along the trackless track –
God guides their wing,
He spreads their table that they nothing lack –
Before the daisy grows a common flower
Before the sun has power
To scorch the world up in his noontide hour.

Gretchen Bernet-Ward

Interviewed by Self

Computer 03

INTERVIEWER:
How many unfinished manuscripts do you have on file?
ME:
I have nine in varying stages of incompleteness.  I love them all, they start off well, the concepts are intriguing, then I stall.
INTERVIEWER:
How do you get over writer’s block?
ME:
At this point my stories can veer one of two ways.  Boringly predictable or Man-I-didn’t-expect-that!  And believe me, you will know the difference when the creative spark ignites.  The momentum is strong, the words flow and come alive.  I run with it and don’t look back.
INTERVIEWER:
What has made you stop writing a particular story?
ME:
When that inspired catalyst fizzles out, mundaneness moves in.  My tale slips into the writing doldrums and my incentive fades away.  I no longer feel the need to flesh out the plot.  Of course, a looming deadline can always prod me into action.
INTERVIEWER:
Do you prefer plot structure or character development?
ME:
Oh, I much prefer characters, I love creating their voices, habits and lifestyles.
INTERVIEWER:
Do you delete your unfinished work?
ME:
Perhaps it sounds better if I say I have nine good story ideas pending completion.
INTERVIEWER:
Does that mean you keep everything you write?
ME:
Yes, and I return to scrappy stories on a regular basis to see if they are worth saving.  Maybe one of them is a work of genius.  To find out, I must keep writing.
INTERVIEWER:
Do you want a coffee?
ME:
Sounds like a good idea!

Gretchen Bernet-Ward       

Notepad and Pencil

Responsive

Gandhi Possessions

Mahatma Gandhi, Indian political and spiritual leader (1869-1948) said “The difference between what we do and what we are capable of doing would suffice to solve most of the world’s problems” and “Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it” because who knows what is around the next bend…

Gretchen Bernet-Ward

Save the Koala

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Imagine if all the food outlets in your city were destroyed in one day.

Imagine if you’re a Koala and all your food trees were destroyed in one day.

It’s unlikely to happen to you, but it’s a frightening fact of life for our Koala population.

A tree is food, shelter and safety for a Koala.

Now imagine if all that was taken away from YOU.

“No Tree No Me”

Koala Foundation Logo 04
https://www.savethekoala.com/shop

Violet Koala

“Save The Koala Month” September each year!
Website: Australian Koala Foundation Save the Koala
Follow: Facebook Australian Koala Foundation

Koala Crying in Gumtree 02

Also check website Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary, Brisbane
“World’s First and Largest Koala Sanctuary”

I visited Brisbane Koala Science Institute at Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary.
https://thoughtsbecomewords.com/2018/09/30/my-visit-to-koala-science-institute/

Gretchen Bernet-WardKoala Foundation Logo 06

My Poésie Comique

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STAY HOME DAY

A clock that ticks
A window that sticks
A wet, scrubbed floor
A locked front door
Home for the day.

A shelf that needs dusting
A tap that is rusting
A load of dirty dishes
A long list of wishes
Home for the day.

A basketful of laundry
A mess from all and sundry
A need to be freed
A desire to read
Home for the day.

♥ Gretchen Bernet-Ward



ODE TO MY COLD

My chest wheezes
My nose sneezes
I continually sniff
Every muscle is stiff.

My eyes are blurry
My tongue is furry
My back is sore
My nerves are raw.

How my head aches
Oh, for heaven’s sakes
Get rid of this pain
I want to be normal again.

♥ Gretchen Bernet-Ward



XBOX LIFESTYLE

My daughter is not a tot
She’s a futuristic robot
The years are a passin’
Now she’s an assassin.

She’s finished her tour of duty
Her score’s a beauty
Masterful chief is circled by gore
Dead aliens become a bore.

Her swearing is profuse
I really should call a truce
She’s grandly thieving cars
And meets a hit man in bars.

My daughter is another girl
Keeping track makes me whirl
A lizard tail on the rim of sky
Oh, dear my brain will fry.

Perhaps limit the time
That she fights crime
When taking on every role
On her Xbox console.

She’s scaly, she’s rough, she’s tough
That’s it, I’ve had enough
I look very smug
In my hand I hold the plug.

 Gretchen Bernet-Ward



BLOGGER

Got myself a WordPress blog
To give my thoughts a jog
I guess I’m just another cog
In the internet machine.

Remember to post every day
So readers won’t go away
But, eh, come what may
On the internet machine.

A photograph looks nice
Attract readers at any price
Make my blog their vice
On the internet machine.

Followers, likes and tags
Stats with peaks and sags
My enthusiasm lags
On the internet machine.

A thought has stirred
I will not be deterred
Write down every word
On the internet machine.

 Gretchen Bernet-Ward

Gears and Cogs 06

Bullying

Bullying 02
Behaviour

To quote Families Magazine “This poster will help your kids to differentiate and identify the difference between being RUDE, being MEAN and BULLYING.”

The self-explanatory poster is one of several free downloads on the website of Families Magazine, an A4 glossy magazine printed every two months and distributed in public libraries and places where families are in Brisbane, Ipswich, Toowoomba, Sunshine Coast and Gold Coast, Australia.

Families Magazine says “Interactions with others can be confusing.  Sometimes what is considered bullying, may in fact be something else?  Bullying is a repetitive behaviour that is designed to intentionally hurt or belittle another person.”

All three behaviours are upsetting to a child, but bullying is the most destructive.

Gretchen Bernet-Ward